3 Questions to Ask Yourself When You Want to Change Your Life

3 Questions to Ask Yourself When You Want to Change Your Life

By Michael Rapson

Ready, willing, and able?

 

Three simple words, yet the complexity of them can be staggering.

 

So, what do they mean?

 

Anything you do in life can come down to these three words.

 

When you want to make a change, these are three questions to ask yourself.

 

Am I ready?

 

Am I ready to make the change that I want to make? Often, a reason a person wants to change is because the pain is so great that a change must occur for the pain to go away.

 

If you aren’t ready to make the change, high chances are, you won’t make it.

 

For years I have offered my brother to help him lose weight and keep it off. He knew that I had the knowledge to help him, yet he didn’t take me up on it. So, he lived the same way, ate the same foods, and the only thing that happened was his weight gain and health decline.

 

It wasn’t until about a year ago that he reached out to me. When he contacted me, I was a bit surprised that he asked me for my help. But, I was willing to give it. He had enough of the up and down cycle he was going through. His pain was too much to bear for him, and he was finally ready to make the change.

 

When I spoke with him recently, he thanked me for helping him get started and said that he should have taken me up on my offer years ago. I simply told him, “It’s okay. You weren’t ready then. I totally understand.” His response was, “Yeah it’s just like anything. If you’re not ready, nothing will work.”

 

What if you are ready?

 

Then there has to be a reason why.

 

You probably wouldn’t want to change something unless there was a reason.

 

Often though, your first response to why you want to change is pretty superficial. It sounds good, but it doesn’t quite dig deep enough emotionally. And everything we do has some sort of emotional backing.

 

For example, you may say you want to look good, or fit into your favorite pair of jeans. While that’s fantastic, it’s not quite deep enough. Why do you want to look good? Why do you want to fit into your favorite pair of jeans?

 

By digging deeper into your first response, you’ll find another compelling reason for why you want to change.

 

You’ll ask why at least five times, sometimes seven. The reason you’ll keep asking why is to find your true reason. The deep down emotional reason that matters to you. When you find this deep down emotional reason, this will be your ultimate intrinsic or internal motivation to keep going toward your goal. Any time you feel those negative thoughts coming or you question your efforts, you can refer back to your “why” and remember or re-spark yourself to keep going.

 

As you go along, your why may change a bit. But the reason will still be compelling enough to stay the path.

 

Let’s look at how to do this.

 

For example on weight loss:

  1. Why do I want to lose weight?

(I want to look good.)

  1. Why do I want to look good?

(I want to look good to feel better about myself.)

  1. Why do I want to feel better about myself?

(So that I have more confidence.)

  1. Why do I want to have more confidence?

(I want to be able to do things that I want to do without doubting whether or not I can.)

  1. Why do I want to do things without doubting whether or not I can?

(I want to be able to do whatever I want without anything holding me back. I have trouble keeping up with my friends and my kids because of my weight. I get tired so easily, and I feel like I’m sitting on the sidelines watching other people live life. I want to be able to live my life as full as possible.)

 

As you can see, losing weight for this person isn’t just about looking good. It’s about being able to live life as full as possible. Your reason why might be different. The importance of it remains the same.

 

Dig as deep as you need to feel the emotion that drives you. You’ll know it when you get to it. You’ll feel a deep connection to it, and it will be your driving force.

 

Am I willing?

 

Am I willing to make the changes I need to make?

 

For something to work, you must be willing to do what it takes to make the change. Change won’t occur unless you do something about it. You must take action.

 

There will be some things you are willing to do, and some that aren’t. For this, you can take a piece of paper and split it into two columns.

 

On one side, write down all of the things you are willing to do. On the other, write down the things you aren’t willing to do.

 

You’ll probably find it easier to find the things you aren’t willing to do. But, they may hold the keys to what is holding you back. Over time, you might shift the things you aren’t willing to do into things that you are.

 

To start, you could do the things you are willing to do. These will help you to build a pattern of success. Find the one easiest thing that you are willing to do that will generate the most impact. Something that you are 100% certain you can do. This will be your starting point for the successes and confidence to build from. After that, work your list and accomplish the others.

 

As you accomplish these things on your willing-to-do list, you might add more as you go along, or even shift some of the things on your not-willing-to-do over to the willing-to-do list.

 

But, don’t overwhelm yourself. Do what you can. Even if it’s just one thing.

 

Am I able?

 

Am I able to make the changes I want to make?

 

This could come in many forms. Do you have the skills already, or do you have to learn new skills? Is your life so busy that you can’t do it? What would you have to do to make it so you are able?

 

Our lives seem to be busier than ever. We have constant distractions, careers, other people seemingly trying to dictate our lives, or even limiting beliefs.

 

The ability to do what you want comes down to the skills you have, the skills you can learn, and the strategies you put into place to reach your goal.

 

If you are able, then there is no limit on what you can do.

 

Believing that you can is the first step.

 

The second step is finding a way to do it, or how.

 

You can do this alone, but you don’t have to. Finding somebody who can help you is a good step to take. You could read books, watch videos, read articles, go to seminars, or get coaching. In my opinion, coaching is the fastest and most efficient way.

 

When my brother asked me for help, he was ready and willing. He was also able to do what was needed to be done for his weight loss. He had some knowledge on healthy foods he could eat. He had skills that could be transferable from other accomplishments he had. The only thing he was lacking was the strategies. Which is why he sought my help. A year later, he’s lost over 105 pounds!

 

Another way to look at ready, willing, and able is to ask these questions. Why, what, and how?

 

Why do I want to change? What do I need to do? And how do I do it?

 

Asking the right questions can open up more possibilities. Instead of asking why is this happening to me? You could ask, what can I do about it?

 

For any change to occur, it’s mainly in your mind. When you have an emotional backing as your reason why, are willing to take action, and use your abilities, you can create the change you set for yourself. Of course, the questions of ready, willing, and able don’t just have to apply to your body and health. It can be applied to business and other aspects of your life. They are transferable.  

 

You can design the life you want and accomplish anything you set your mind to. If you need help, find the fit that works best for you.

 

Decide what you want and go for it!

Want to get in the best shape of your life? Let me help.

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Maybe it’s been a while since you’ve been in shape, or felt energized throughout your entire day, or felt capable and confident enough to do what you truly want.

If you’re ready to have the body you deserve and get in control of your health and fitness once and for all, I’m ready to help. You’ve tried doing it alone. Now try with someone who’s ready to bring a commitment as serious as your own.

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I hope to have the opportunity to help you transform your body and life forever.

But the next step is up to you.

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© 2019 Michael Rapson