Whenever somebody wants to lose weight, have a better body, or better health there is always a reason why. And not everybody’s reason is the same. You have your own reason or reasons.
That reason you are feeling is why I coach. I genuinely care about people and love to help them succeed. I want to help their pain go away and live a happier life.
Most people when they start a new program have some sort of change they want to make happen and will have some fears. You might be nervous about getting injured, or confused about what to do. Maybe you’ve tried things in the past and they didn’t work the way you wanted them to, which can be frustrating to say the least.
With all of the conflicting information out there, it's understandable why somebody might be apprehensive. There is so much information, that you might fall into what is called “analysis paralysis”. This is where you get stuck trying to decide what to do, and then end up doing nothing at all.
In order for change to occur though, you have to break free of what you are already doing. Because if what you are doing was working for you, then there is no need to change it. When people come to me for coaching, it’s because they realize that what they are doing isn’t working, and they want something that will break the cycle.
My story
When I first starting exercising, I hated it. I’d rather play my trumpet. In fact, I hated exercising so much, I failed gym in school. One of the easiest classes to pass, and I failed it. All I had to do was participate. But, I didn’t. I didn’t want to get sweaty, change my clothes in the locker room, and feel embarrassed by the way I look. There were reasons why I didn’t want to get sweaty or change in the locker room. The first reason was I didn’t want to stink. Sure, I could take a shower after class. But that brings me to my next reason. I didn’t want to change in the locker room or take a shower out of fear. Fear that I would get teased or beat up at my most vulnerable state.
And that fear ultimately affected more of my confidence break down. At an early age and throughout my later teens, I was teased a lot. Sometimes to the point of bullying. I thought and acted differently than the other kids and wasn’t interested in the typical boy stuff, like playing sports. I developed a defense mechanism of not letting people get to know me out of fear of getting my feelings hurt or even physically hurt. So, I developed a get ‘em before they get me attitude. Those who got through my “wall”, became my friends. I was really a caring person but was really afraid that people would hurt me in the process.
I wasn’t strong, had turkey drum-sticks for legs, and even though I talked a good game, physically there was no way I could defend myself. This sparked my need for change. In the last year of high school, I did find something enjoyable in the physical realm. That was weight-lifting.
Even though I wasn’t strong, there was a bench press in my home that my older brother had left behind. So, I started lifting. At the time, I couldn’t do a single push-up, let alone a pull-up. And squats? Forget it. I couldn’t even do a full squat with my own body weight. I started out on the bench press with a 15-pound bar and 5-pound weights on each side. A whopping total of 25 pounds! I also did some other basic exercises that I knew how to do, like sit-ups, etc.
That set the tone for my confidence to be built. Gradually, heavier weights were lifted and I was learning more exercises by reading anything I could find. Back in those days, the internet was super young and everything that I could get my hands on was in book or magazine form. I started to enjoy my new found strength, increased physique was being built, and I developed a thirst for more knowledge.
One of the first full books I read about fitness as a starting point was Arnold Schwarzenegger’s “The New Encyclopedia of Modern Bodybuilding”. Arnold was a hero to me. Like him or not, everything he set his mind to he achieved. And he’s achieved a ton. That book taught me a lot. Not only about fitness in general, but more of the mind and how the mind is the foundation to achieving great success. Also learned from that book, even though I wanted to become a bodybuilder at the time, was my muscles were short and would make it harder for me to compete at the bodybuilding level. That didn’t deter me from wanting to be better though.
I still kept absorbing everything I could, and still do. Later, martial arts came along. Remember that fear I had about getting beat up? I wanted to solve that. Through that journey I learned to be humble, and that hurting people was not the answer. Physically, I would get hurt and had to learn how to fix myself after an injury and prevent the injury from happening in the first place while training. Martial arts also taught me how to control my body better and be more in tune with it.
Though my confidence was building, I still didn’t have the exact physique I wanted. And I learned that was more from a nutrition perspective. Yep, you probably guessed it. More learning. As I hit my early twenties, friends and family would seek out my help because of the knowledge I had gained. I realized that I loved helping people. That enraged the fire I already had in myself to learn more so I could help more.
Fast forward through falling in love, getting married, having two wonderful kids (my ultimate pride and joy), working 40 to 80 hour weeks in various industries like car washes, the food industry, warehouse, manufacturing while attending college full time towards a fitness career while having my first new born, food and retail management, a second child, and going through a divorce, I never lost my passion for helping people achieve greater success through fitness and nutrition.
Seven years ago, I decided to pursue coaching as a full-time career. Even though I had a ton of knowledge, most of my learning came from working with clients. I've worked with people from the age of 5 years old in a Motor Mentors program I ran at my daughter’s school, to 87 years old. There were all different types of goals. I’ve worked with everybody from high school athletes to working parents to seniors. There were clients who had shoulder, neck, back, knee, elbow, ankle and foot problems, gastric by-passes, heart issues, etc. I'll freely admit when I don’t know something, but I will do my best to find a solution.
Most importantly what these clients have taught me is that everybody is different in some way. While the physical ailments might be similar, the psychological aspect of how people think and feel is different. Each person has his/her own views, beliefs, values, and perceptions and that affects how he/she lives.
How does all of this help you?
I understand how pain in somebody’s life can affect what they do and how they feel. We've all had our share of pain. No way should we want to live like that. From that pain, it has made me want to be and do better. There have been times that life got so busy that my own personal fitness and health was put on the backburner. I gained weight, and that affected my confidence poorly. I've lost weight, to the point where it became unhealthy, and then gained muscle back in the process and lived more healthfully. Habits were learned and created that would serve my life better, and it's still a work in progress. My why’s for doing things changed as I got older. Now, instead of wanting to look like a fitness model, a new goal is wanting to maintain great health so I can be around for my kids and enjoy doing things with them, and eventually with my grandchildren.
The reason most people want to change is that the pain has become so great, whether it be poor confidence, poor health, injury, or whatever else might be a problem for them, is that they want to get rid of that pain once and for all.
This is where I come in.
I’ve spent the last 21 years learning everything I can to support you in your goals. Things like nutrition, exercise selection and technique, science, and psychological aspects of why people think like they do. I'll do my best to understand who you are, where you are and where you want to go, and what drives you.
I help people recognize counter-productive routines they’ve fallen into, acknowledge them, and realistically switch them out with better habits. This is a fancy way of saying, you'll have help to alleviate the pain you are feeling, and be given the tools to make your life better.
First, I start by getting to know you. What are the things you are doing well? What is your life like? From there, we can build from that. If there are routines that aren’t serving you well, we work together by switching those out for things that will work better for you.
A very important part of being healthy, looking and feeling better is nutrition. Most people struggle with it. This is typically where the most confusion happens. “What do I eat?” “When do I eat?” “Do I have to starve myself to achieve what I want?” These are some typical questions.
The answer to that is more of how you eat, not so much what you eat. What you eat does a play a role, but when you know how to eat and build the habits around that, the what and when to eat falls into place. And no, you don’t have to starve yourself. In fact, that’s counter-productive because that would cause you hate it and would cause more pain. Remember, we are trying to get rid of that.
Then there is the fitness part of it. You'll have help to find the things that you enjoy doing to get more physically fit. Sure, you may have some things you don’t enjoy much, but those things will get you to your ultimate goal. I dislike doing squats, but I know they are necessary if I want to move better. Resistance training is by far the best way to get stronger. And by being stronger means that everyday tasks become easier and improves your overall health. That doesn’t mean you have to kill yourself and hate the process. It means that we find the things that serve you best.
You might want to be more flexible or build your core. You might want to look better in a swimsuit. You might want more accountability, confidence, motivation, or just to feel better. Whatever your reason, we will discover it. We call that your “why”. Usually it’s a lot deeper than most people think. Once we find that out, motivation isn’t much of an issue. Your motivation comes from your why. The whole reason for wanting the change in the first place.
Anything that you do and that you feel is worth doing, starts in the mind first. Once you get a grasp on that, the rest will follow. By learning new habits for better nutrition and exercise, which are things you do to get to feeling great and achieving better health, and by tapping into the positive psychological side of things, there is nothing that you can’t do. You have the potential to leading any life that you want to have. By learning the tools, in which you'll have help, you can achieve more than you thought possible.
We’ll work together to develop the strategies that work best for you and eliminate the confusion, so you can lead a better life.